Idenfity Your Stressors
The trials and tribulations that cause tension in our lives are personal problems, yet they often fall into larger categories of common anxiety triggers. These universal stress points — money, relationships, work, time constraints — are often painfully obvious to everyone involved. Other times, however, they can hide behind our own excuses and denials, while we blame others for our problems and overlook the true causes.
Keeping a stress journal for a period of one or two weeks can help you better identify the specific sources of turbulence in your life, while these common stressors may highlight areas that need special attention.
Money Issues
Financial stress is nothing new, but in recent years it’s skyrocketed to the top of our worry list: In the American Psychological Association’s 2009 Stress in America report, it was the number one issue reported, with 71 percent of those surveyed saying that money was a significant or very significant source of stress in their lives. The economy was mentioned by 63 percent of respondents, and housing costs by 47 percent.
Americans are also feeling the health fallout of the economic downturn in myriad ways, from being unable to sleep at night to losing their health coverage or retirement funds. Worrying about these things will only make them worse — but you can try to use your stress as motivation to improve the areas you can still change.
A Job That Never Ends
In today’s world of smartphones, laptops, and telecommuting, work and play have become strange bedfellows — and not only because you occasionally fall asleep next to your laptop. The boundaries separating labor from leisure have all but dissolved: You might be at dinner or even on a beach somewhere, but if you’re responding to an email from your boss, are you really there?
This doesn’t mean you’re doomed to 24/7 enslavement, however; you just need to figure out new ways to manage your work-life balance and set boundaries between your job and your free time.
A Job You Don’t Like
We all aspire to find joy in our careers, but during times of economic stress, loving what you do can be a luxury. The emptiness of a monotonous job can be a slow poison, and your performance can suffer. Still, you may feel it’s hard to complain at a time when so many people are unemployed.
The key to surviving a go-nowhere job is to revise your perception of what you do. You may not have a lot of control over your work life now, but you have total control over your attitude.
Your Relationship
In close relationships, there are fights — and then there are fights. Some spring from watershed issues: how to save or spend money, how to raise the kids, how to honor religious beliefs. But this isn’t what couples fight about most of the time. Instead, we argue over loading the dishwasher properly, cutting toenails on the coffee table, and cleaning the cat box when it’s your turn.
While the offenses may seem minor enough, these garden-variety arguments can cause tremendous stress, contributing to general wear and tear on a relationship. But when you stop reacting and start responding with compassion, you can defuse silly squabbles and help strengthen your bond.
Constant Caregiving
It’s bad enough when you get sick yourself, but if you’re the caregiver to a parent, a child, or a sick spouse, you have even more to worry about.
In 2009’s Stress in America Survey, “personal health problems” and “health problems affecting my family” were each cited by 47 percent of participants as a significant or very significant source of stress. (Only financial and relationship issues ranked higher.)
If you’re fighting your own health concerns, remember to address your emotional needs as well as your physical ones. And if you’re caring for someone else with a chronic illness, you’ll need self-care strategies to keep yourself healthy.
